Day 10: "A diet is when you watch what you eat and wish you could eat (or drink) what you watch." - Hermione Gingold

Down .2 this morning! Not mad, considering I was expecting a gain after yesterdays loss.

First things first, I need to celebrate the fact that tonight I went out for my friend's bday- AND DID NOT DRINK. This is a miracle. Especially since we were at a club and everyone was getting trashed next to me. I managed to keep it together by chewing on ice and fresh squeezed lime juice. IT WAS HARD. We even had a table— with bottle service. At one point, I fantasized about grabbing a bottle of vodka out of my friends hand and chugging - all Hangover style- it was like in the movies where someone pictures something happening and then they snap back to reality. It was extremely difficult for me, since I hate turning down a good birthday celebration, but it was proof that I could have (some) fun without drinking :)

The diet is still rough, I am trying to find ways to work it a little bit— by trying to eat my breakfast a little later so I am not STARVING at lunch... and eating lunch an hour later, so I'm not starving by 4:00. This helps a bit. Plus the recipes are getting better. Tonight I had green cauliflower soup. It was soooo good. I added a little garlic, basil, and onion to the recipe which I think, made it better. Perhaps when this diet is over I will make this a regular staple.

Day 8: Holy Sh*t- you're lyin!

TWO! TWO! TWO FLIPPIN' POUNDS!

 I actually had to get off the scale and get back on to make sure I read it correctly. I thought my eyes might be playing tricks on me- NO! I lost 2 pounds! For a grand total of 5.4 pounds for the whole week! I haven't lost that much weight in one week since the first week I did weight watchers-  back when I was ... ahem A LOT heavier and A LOT younger. :)

Even better, do you see this picture? This is me in my new jeans... excuse me, my new old jeans... I havent been able to fit into these for two years. They are still a bit tight. Helloooo camel-toe. But in no time I am sure they will fit just right!

I am also happy to report todays breakfast recipe called for pasta! :) And trust me, I savored every morsel. I am a bit surprised Bob lets us eat something so starchy, especially since he seems so dead set against complex carbs.- I guess as long as its not after breakfast (rule 3).

It sort of makes me worried - a big loss followed by pasta? The overly cautious side of me smells a gain for tomorrow. Sigh, if that happens I guess I will just have to power through...

Day 7: For the love of god, no more chicken, PLEASE!

Let me just say, if there wasn't something pressing— something very, very special coming up I would not be able to stick to this diet.

It is really hard.

And I am already SICK of eating chicken and greens. Bleeeech. 

I am also frustrated. Today I was the exact same weight as yesterday. Ugh! It has been three days of near perfect diet behavior and I am pretty much stuck in the same place on the scale. This makes it hard to keep going.

I know it takes time. It is just that I want results now. Especially when I am working so hard.

Tomorrow morning will mark one week.

In addition to all my hard work, this diet takes TIME —AND LOTS OF PREP WORK. I feel like Im either prepping food or exercising.

On an up note, there is a silver lining about Week 2 on this plan. New recipes! Looks like pasta for breakfast, shrimp, tropical fruit....even steak for dinner next week!

Thank goodness because I am starting to hate chicken.

Total weight loss so far: 3.2

Day 6: “Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell.” ~Unknown

Shut your face. 

I can hear you calling me through the G-D cabinets!

No matter how hard I try it constantly nags me. Taunts me. Tempts me.

It's sugar.

And its up to its old tricks again.

I mean just one little - bitty bite ... how much could it hurt?

I continue to remind myself that I gained .2 today. That little bite could make a difference, I keep telling myself, like a mantra, just keep repeating it. I AM STRONGER THAN SUGAR.

Like a drug addict. I am feanding. Sugar makes me crazy, I mean, I wanted to stab a coworker with a butter knife the other day, come on!

Luckily the recipes have been pretty good today. And that make a huge difference on this diet. I even got to have almond butter and blueberry oatmeal this morning and a mock spaghetti bolognese (using spagetti squash).

 I think the added carbs helped with the required early morning workout- Rule 6 (Jillian Micheals 30 day shred). And I generally felt less tired today .In fact I even managed to limp a long through a Zumba class... even if I was the girl in the back swaying back in forth like a windsocks in a used car lot.... I am sure I burned enough calories to negate that damn poptart bite. :)

Day 5: “Proper preparation prevents poor performance.” ~Charlie Batch

Surprisingly, even after my cupcake slip up yesterday I am down .6 for a total of 3.4, not too bad for 5 days in!

With that being said, I am nervous about tomorrow. I tried to stick with the recipes as much as possible and follow the rules carefully. But life happens and this diet is hard. With a very strict 800 calorie budget- Rule 2, I am exhausted. I have been so tired and just feeling too run-down to work out in my normal fashion. If I don't keep up with the caffeine I just want to crawl in bed and nap all day. It also leaves me prone to snacking... cue almond slices and a potato chips. In fact, I really should be doing my workout video right now, but I can barely keep my eyes open to finish this post.

One rule I have been ignoring a bit, Rule 10. Fall back on Veggies. I can eat as much leafy greens as I want, in addition to 800 cals. But I never do. So I decided to cut up & bag a bunch of veggies so its really convenient- no excuses to be hungry anymore!

Let's hope the extra veggies will give me more energy and I'll feel like myself again.

Day 4: Three mini cupcakes and I am a new person.

Today I may have bent Bob's rules a bit.

My lunch was 3 mini cupcakes.

There. I said it, and I'm not ashamed. I swear, they were really small and I am much happier now that I've had my sugar!

Part of the reason I caved is, I left the house hungry. I didn't have breakfast until 11 and then skipped the required lunch. By 4pm I was starving and by defenses were down. Probably not the best time to walk into a cupcake shop. Doh!

On the plus side, I am learning some new healthy recipes! Todays breakfast was the best so far: 5 egg whites with chopped asparagus, Ezekial bread with avocado shmear and a cup of strawberries.

No loss today. But no gain either.

Total loss so far-  2.8 pounds.

Day 3: I want to stab you with a butter knife

Its only three days in and I am already having delusional thoughts. I think I am so hungry that my body is starting to eat my brain. Hm, maybe that is why we have to take THREE fish oil pills a day (rule 9)... to offset the brain deterioration.

Normally, I'm a very nice girl (most would say) but today I am crabby, irritable and generally unpleasant to be around.

I may be losing my sanity.

This morning I walked into the employee Dining Room and saw a man buttering a delicious piece of toast with a very satisfied look on his face. Immediately, my first thought was, "I want to stab you. With a butter knife. With the one you are using. Right. Now." He was so smug.... not really.... He's in IT. He's a very nice guy. But at that moment I wanted to go all exorcist on his ass.

Today I told my coworker that if she brought in cupcakes I would smash them in her face. I really like her but I think I might do it, I'm feeling very unstable.

The cravings are insane. Today its cake. I am seeing it everywhere. Yesterday it was bagels. The day before, gummy worms. I swear if I don't get some sugar my neck is going to crane sideways and my head is going to start spinning in circles.

THANK GOD I lost another pound. Its the only thing thats keeping me going.

Total loss= 2.8